There Is Progress

And this brings up another format with which I am familiar, start writing and let’s see what comes out. Carola and I just went to see the latest Harry Potter movie; it was long and complicated. We have help in the house to give us a break from taking care of mom. The help called after we had our lunch and said that mom’s leg was bleeding pretty badly and didn’t know for sure what to do, so we came home. Our day out was a nice movie and lunch and I appreciate that.

Last night at the billiard club, I won my match. Several times during, I repeated my daily “When competing, I do it to win,” and “When in a competitive or conspicuous situation, I am calm, cool, and collected because I am the boss, I am in charge.” Now I don’t subscribe to mental powers that extend beyond my own head but when I repeated these dailies the situation turned around. My opponent missed his shot and I went on out. This happened twice and it is probably because my opponent was more anxious than I; and they could have had a calming effect on me to allow me to make my shots. A more superstitious person could say that I telepathically caused him to miss his shots. In any event, I won my match fair and square and I was pretty darned proud of myself for doing so.

The dailies have been a source of personal power to me and I literally repeat them daily. When I say these, and those that specify what and why for the endeavors, I am able to stay on a track that is positive and constructive. Another example is that I’ve lost several pounds because repeating my daily keeps me in the mind set of eating less and doing more. I am now within four pounds of my desired weight of 198 pounds, down from eight. It seems that it takes a good long while for me to adopt the supporting actions necessary to realize the desired end result described in/by the daily, sometimes in retrospect it may take months. But then all of a sudden it kicks in and the results start showing up. It seems that the desired result becomes so ingrained that I am no longer cognizant of doing things differently; yet I am but it’s because it has subtly become part of me. The improvement is gradual at times; other times it is step function difference, but one thing for sure it happens. The improvement comes and the success is gained. OTOH when the daily efforts are not made, the desired end result slips away, sometimes into limbo, other times into oblivion until I come across some missive that refers to an abandoned dream.

There was a call from Woody Northup, District Governor elect for 2010/11, asking me to spearhead a GSE team for France in his term. This is great news and if I can become the leader of such a team that will be yet another dream come true. I would propose a team to go to the district that contains Chantilly and thereby visit again chez Lina on the Avenue de Montmorency, enface de Foret du Chantilly. It will/is up to me to see that this happens.

If I could have chosen a place to live, to belong to, to be seen as I was in Baden by all the passers-by, it is Chantilly. It is one of the locations of a previous life and I am drawn to it by a certain familiarity. I would live there as I am here, involved in the community on a minor level and with a circle of friends that liked horses, riding, and socializing on a superficial level. I would be involved with companies who needed my special talents; eventually becoming very French in my language, manners, and outlook. Somehow the day to day life in Chantilly has an appeal for me.

I am registered now for a class in French Theater for the fall. It will be on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1pm to 2:15 and taught by Dr. John Greene. It is an important class in which to be enrolled because I think it is a pre requisite to be taking classes at UofL to be able to perform in a production by the Theater Arts Department. There was a curious question at the end of Rinda Frye’s Email concerning me taking classes; now I can say, “Yes.” In addition to this, the class is theater related and French so there you are; all the bases are covered.

It is interesting to note that I am on the inside at UofL as a continuing education person. Not taking anything away from a degree seeking student, contributing my time, talent, and participation to classes that are otherwise not very enthusiastically supported by those enrolled. I carried some of the sessions for Drs Day and Greene when their questions were met with stony silence by the somewhat reticent students. People recognize me and are supportive; I enjoy taking advantage of the social aspect of the situation. It gives me a venue that would otherwise require joining some other venue.

This is an important contrast to be made with the students in Theater Arts. These people are wide open and friendly, full of enthusiasm and participation, often talking animatedly to each other before, during, and after class. Somewhat closed to me at first but when they see that I’m not a crackpot and not a threat they open up nicely. As an aside, a former classmate working at Tinsel town, called me out today and we talked about what is transpiring in his and my life now. That has also happened with French class mates but much less frequently. No telling how many encounters have passed unnoticed.

The message that is coming through in this writing is the importance of knowing what I am about; reminding myself of it; and taking advantage of oppys for achievement. I don’t want to hurt my arm patting myself on the back but then I have developed a nice routine for accomplishment. What is lacking is imagination and focus for finding and achieving a suitable lifetime goal.