Psychic Disease

The recurrence of what we call Evil in the world is worth some exploration.  Throughout history we are given accounts of extremes often ascribed to a person but more often the extreme was supported by those around them.  Some examples are Nero, Caligula, the Spanish Inquisition, the French Revolution, Napoleon, Hitler, Hussein in Iraq, the current Iran regime, the current Syrian regime, Al Qaeda, Venezuela’s Chavez, and I am sure that one can come up with many more examples.

Those listed above achieved the extreme on a grand scale and in more than one way.  There are many who achieve it on a lesser scale.  The movie Wolf of Wall Street is a story about a man who engaged in extreme self indulgence.  Because the details of Bernard Madoff are not as yet revealed, one can only imagine his lifestyle.  It is safe to say that most people who amass a fortune and then spend it satisfying their own appetites and those around them are examples.

“Of what,” you may ask.  And the answer is excessive (and you fill in the blank.)  We see examples of this in what people own and have on, where they live, and in how many places they maintain residence and there is a fine difference between getting along comfortably and being excessive.

In our society, that is the set of legal and ethical rules that we as a nation have adopted, the only arbiter of the situation is the person making the decision as to how to spend his resources, resources converted into money for spending.

There is now a mentality being expressed by the current president that the government should step in and manage this set of affairs for people; this isn't new, income tax was among the first such movements.  The extent to which he and his administration, including the sympathetic members of Congress, are successful in managing the distribution of wealth remains to be seen.  The majority of thinking people will decide that in future elections.

This is not, however, a political essay.  It is an attempt to pose the question: is there such a thing as psychic disease? 

In thinking about it as I write, I am inclined to think along the lines of Aristotle and perhaps agree with his philosophy of “the mean.”  I can’t quote chapter and verse but the sense of it is that going to excess is harmful or, perhaps, excess is a psychic disease.

Using the word disease as it is defined in a dictionary, i.e. a condition of the living animal or plant body or of one of its parts that impairs normal functioning and is typically manifested by distinguishing signs and symptoms, one could come to this conclusion.

Another expression of this same idea is the seven deadly sins, Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy, and Pride.  It can be seen that these are all extreme excesses of basic virtues. 

There is a direct parallel between diseases of the body and the psyche.  Such a disease can be self induced, inherited due to the influences of family, one can be infected by a culture that supports it, or it can be passed along from another who is infected or is a carrier of it, much like  polio  or tuberculosis.

It can get to epidemic proportion such as that which affected revolutionary France, Germany after WWI, or the Bolshevik Revolution in Russia.  These psychic diseases were exploited by megalomaniacs to the point of chaos and stopping the spread of it/them was only achieved with the resolve of those who recognized them for what they were.This is where we are today with religious extremism. 

The conclusion is that there are psychic diseases that breed in dissatisfaction and misery in the emotional sources of individuals and that they can be controlled but not eradicated.  

Winter Woe

This is a winter of discontent.  We have been hit by yet another winter storm that added ice to the already existing snow on the ground; it causes me to hunker down and write.  

Our activities are different when we're cooped up like this; appointments were kept yesterday because the storm didn't come through until later.  Two big ones were cancelled, however, and they will be added to the calendar to be made up.

It gives me a chance to be circumspect about matters that by themselves may not be worthy of a thousand words.  One of these is the matter of fear.  

The other day, when looking at the schedule coming up for performing, i.e. auditions and classes, I was gripped with a bit of anxiety that could have been fear.  So I took a longer, closer look at what I was feeling and decided that yes, it was.  But in taking this closer look I realized that while fear does enter into the picture, what we do when experiencing it makes all the difference in the world.

To be afraid is a normal response to an experience looming with which we have not dealt in the past.  We have many of these all the time but when they are scheduled, planned, and we are supposed to be prepared for them, the importance of our performance is magnified and the possibility of not being successful exists.  What we have here is a fear of not living up to our own expectations.

Be advised that fear has not held me back.  I have been in new and strange situations for most of my adult life.  I have not backed away from any of them regardless of my state of preparedness.  But this fear of not living up to expectations  is a factor with which I must deal each time; it is real.  Preparation will somewhat allay the fear but I have found that no amount of preparation is enough; the only way is to push through the performance, whatever the outcome, and it works.

Performing on stage or in film is a little different.  There is a script and there are rehearsals for performance and these tend to prepare one.  In performing, this fear is experienced at the audition, not on stage during the run.  It is the fear of not living up to what is expected of me.  This is quite interesting to me because until now it wasn’t all that clear just what it is that causes this fear or anxiety.

Having discovered the root cause may allow me to deal with it more successfully than in the past; or perhaps I need to simply reduce my expectations. 

A second matter that bears a few words is that of conversation.  I recently read a book about dialog and was made aware of an important observation on it, that conversation is a power struggle among those participating in it as one or more attempt to maintain control of thoughts being expressed.

Observations of me and others in conversation bear this out.  All too often one will change the subject in an attempt to redirect the conversation to one of his choosing, or will put a spin on it to shift it to more align with his mode of thinking or expression.  In fact he is all the while attempting to subordinate the other(s) to his thinking.  This is the power struggle that can occur in conversation if the participants are not consciously aware of it.

It is interesting to note that one who is exerting his influence in the conversation at present may have been more passive until now and may again be passive later; and so on around the circle.  It seems that assertion and passivity are directly related to the amount of psychic energy available in the individual at the time and when it is spent it is gone until it again is replenished in some manner.

The relative placement of the participants in a hierarchy is also a determinant of whose is “in charge” of the conversation.  This is especially true in political situations where the power structure is not defined by a charter.   

It is the rebellious subordinate who attempts to wrest the power of leadership in conversation and exert his position; an astute leader must then deal with this rebellion.    The more experienced and accepted the leader, the easier it is to deal with a rebellious subordinate.  There are, however, subordinates who will not be silenced; a great example is Corporal Napoleon Bonaparte.

A third idea to be expounded is that of personal course work.  It occurred to me that my formal education has given me the necessary ability to formulate courses of instruction that I can follow without going to a place such as a school for material structured by someone else.

Some of my endeavors require more knowledge before I can get the results for which I am looking; two of these are Actor and Playwright.  To this end I went the library, which has an extensive collection of books on the subjects, and selected three that seemed most aligned with the direction I want to take.

It follows that to spend between one and two hours, three times a week for the fifteen weeks studying the contents of these, and other books, and doing the work described by the authors in the forewords, prefaces and introductions of their books, I would be completing the equivalent of a college course.  So that’s what I’m doing.

A fourth issue is that of video auditions.  I did one yesterday and I’m not happy with the results even though I haven’t seen them.  The format was the same as all the many before this and I am not encouraged to think that it will be successful.  

If I was comparing me and a more polished actor, I would choose him.  I must do something about this and aside from recording “selfie” auditions I don’t know what that would be.  Help!

On Leaving Here

(Since posting this, I've realized that it isn't necessary to move to NY, LA, or Chicago to work there; one can work there and live anywhere so long as he has travel money.)

Why have I remained here so long?  We got rid of the business 14 years ago in May; I haven’t worked or tried to get a job since.  For the first several years after giving up the business, I worked part time here and there halfheartedly trying to find something to which to devote my time.  Then there was Mom and all of that.  Since she died in 2009, I've been involved in theater and film, and filling in the rest of the time participating in activities that I enjoy.

The only things holding us here are the physical and emotional impacts of selling the house and relocating to a different place.   Many of the people we know would soon be forgotten, just as we would be by them and we would have to start all over again.

All that we have would either be discarded or packed and taken along.  We have accumulated a lot of things, most of which are worthless to anyone but us.  We don’t throw away anything that we have here that we think may be of some use to us.

So, let’s do some hypothetical thinking.  Suppose we were offered a move that would net for us the equity we have in the house and would allow us to take along everything that we felt was necessary.  I.O.W, the same deal that we had upon leaving Newport News.

Why would we leave here?  I want to be an actor that audiences want to pay good money to see on stage and in film.  The prospect is bleak for finding enough work here as an actor on stage, in film and commercials.  There are plenty of stage opportunities but they are gratis, i.e. for the love of the art; paid work is a limited market for films, commercials, and modeling.

The entertainment and cultural aspects of this location are high-end minor league and the psyche of the city is myopic.  There don’t seem to be identifiable core businesses that are local, all are owned by others who don’t live here; hence the understanding of what it takes is missing. 

The local managements of the big companies are not involved in the community as leaders because their future is elsewhere.  The movers and shakers are not here and what is left has more form than substance.

Why would we stay here?  We are settled here, adapted to the culture, and have everything that we need.  We have acquaintances upon whom we can call if there’s an emergency.

There are doctors, hospitals, professionals of all sorts.  We are comfortable in the marketplace.  The sources of satisfaction for all of my endeavors, and more, are available.  The University, library, and museum scenes are good and available to us.  The city is large enough to afford a certain familiarity and anonymity at the same time.   

I am aware that as a person gets older his world seems to begin to shrink around him.  It is no longer all that important to be seen out and about.  The circle of people with whom one associates tends to be smaller and less frequent without a feeling of loss.  We tend to eat less, use less, keep less, buy less, wear out and discard more.  Although it seems that way it isn’t necessarily true; it could be that our imagination grows less active; still the energy to get out and do is ebbing.

Then there’s the uncertainty that making a leap of faith entails.  While we have an income upon which to rely for basics, there’s always the chance that all would be forsaken in Chicago, Houston, Los Angeles, New York, or San Francisco.  It may be that fear is holding me back.  

The Newport News strategy was a decision.  I wanted to get away from St. Louis and be on my own; the shipyard offered me the way to do that.  I/we didn't know anything about the city, the area, the state except what we were able to glean from publications, which was scant little.  The other major relocations to Houston, then Europe, and Milwaukee were dictated by the company.
  

The move here was likewise motivated by the market that was available and research about the place including an exploratory visit.  It was, however, more based on blind faith than anything else.  A different strategy could be employed, different from any of the others.  In retrospect, the way we picked Louisville was pretty good.

A move away would be preceded by secondary and primary research; reading local papers, finding the locations in them that are desirable, looking at playbills of current events, and generally getting a sense of how it would be.  Use local connections through Rotary Clubs and visit to gauge the social milieu that goes along with the location and life style.  Then make the decision and go.

When I think of my current situation, marketing oneself is an activity in which one must spend time and effort, now and if we would make a move.  We are active in the theater circles, especially when I’m working.

There are things to do and people with whom to associate.  This would be a good bit of rehearsal for the larger stage, being involved with the Arts community even more than I currently am; perhaps working in a community theater organization, continuing to take classes wherever and whenever I can, and keep the image out there on Facebook, which seems to be the local advertising media for the acting community.  There is a balance to be struck not to overdo it.

My belief in the omniscient connection may be the answer; what will be is what I want.  There are so many of me involved in the decision that it may seem irrational when it happens but it will be for the best.  Meanwhile I’ll continue to pursue my endeavors and work on my goals and objectives.  The dreams that I have can be pursued actively here and now without fear of wasting time or effort.  

Que sera sera avec une peu de l’aide de l’âme. 

Vocalizing the Dream

Why did I work in the shipyard so long?  The pay wasn't competitive and yet I stayed there because I didn't know that I could do any better.  Is not knowing another way of saying I didn't think I was worthy of more or better, or was I simply satisfied with what I had and what I was doing?

But most of this is simply sour grapes.  I wanted to work there, it was the premiere shipyard in the world; I excelled in every job that I had, was recognized and promoted to management and then to the parent company headquarters.  In the meantime we raised our kids in a good environment; they had enough of a foundation to make their way in the world.  I didn't feel the need to do any better.  I should stop here but the urge to talk it out has to be satisfied.

At times I bemoaned the fact that I had to do it all by myself without the moral support of a trusted mentor and adviser.  I suppose I am something of a blockhead because there was rarely anyone to whom I would listen and I remember a few times that I was given advice and only two bits of it that took.

My father-in-law said to go to work for a large corporation and stay there and that was good advice at the time.  Another mentor advised me to go back for a degree in Naval Architecture which I didn't take but went back for an MBA on my own volition.  My boss, upon appointing me Controller-Treasurer of a shipyard subsidiary, simply told me, “Don’t ever reverse a profit.”  Good advice that I heeded through thick and thin as we battled for change-order payments.

My thinking was somewhat limited and kept me in the middle management ranks as I reflect back now on my jobs and for whom I worked.  It was limited by that to which I was exposed and my reluctance to be imaginative and open to higher ideals.

The ideas and philosophy of the level of executive ranks above me was not apparent to me and I wasn't able to figure it out.  I was a camel and thought of myself as a good one while not seeing that the leaders were horses.  Somehow others figured it out but not I.  I suppose I thought I was doing as well as I possibly could.  

Keeping my own counsel may have been a disadvantage.  Things that happened to me when I was growing up made me distrust people “above” me.  Now I know especially one precise incident that was all but forgotten but not really.  Rarely did I confide in my "superiors" what I was thinking.  This prevented any flow of ideas and philosophy from them and ergo stunted my thinking.

The real benefit of all this comes from realizing these things and not letting them discourage or deflate me.  I can look back on a career in engineering and management and see great accomplishments.  My foray into business was doomed from the start by much of the above and my bullheadedness and even there I got out with my shirt; no mean feat.

Then reflecting on two shipyard associates, one was a peer and the other a subordinate; I see differences that led to the different outcomes.  The peer was not bound by pride of accomplishment but rather expediently rolled with the waves; he was intelligent, personable, and compliant; willing to play a subordinate role in exchange for being in the room with those who made the big decisions.  He eventually became a vice-president and then president of the company, leading it to a successful, and profitable for the stockholders, take-over by a larger corporation.

The subordinate was loyal, incredibly intelligent, and idealistic.  He was ambitious and had an abiding belief in his own success.  He had big and unrealistic ideas but pursued them because he believed in them.  Few of them panned out but his belief in them obtained for him the chance to try them and in a very real sense he became highly successful.  His ideas led him to positions in other technology companies where he made millions in compensation.

None of my peers was smarter or better educated; it was self-reliance that stymied me, I may have had too much of it.  I was a top player on a minor league team when success would have been a starter on a major league team.  Now I’m retired from the game but it is not too late for this introspection.

Acting is the same as other paths I've taken, I have big dreams and the belief that I am worthy of them, which comes from within.  Sharing and vocalizing dreams are important regardless of what others say and think.  Finding and associating with successful others of like mind are likewise important ingredients.  

 

 A path in life can be more pleasant and successful when it is walked in the company of others of like mind; others who are open and honest, who share their thoughts and feelings; those that aren't and won’t need to be shunned.  And feeling worthy of your dreams is per-requisite to achieving them.

Make the contact; that is the directive.  Think in terms of finding those who have similar aspirations; the admonition.  You look fine, you act refined, you have a good vocabulary and write well.  You are not in competition with these others but rather in the same boat.  If they get the part, if they get the publicity, if they get the big pay; it’s OK.  If, for some reason you make a poor choice, not to worry.  They can use you but they can’t use you up.

Unshakable faith in the realization of your dreams will overcome any setback you may have.  By any objective measure, you are worthy of being successful whatever you decide to do or to get.

The vector of time is always pointing to the future; the past is gone and best forgotten except to learn lessons from experiences, good and bad.  This dissertation is part of that learning experience, the value of vocalizing the dream.

On Getting and Paying for It

One of the first concerns I have when setting out to get something is, “Am I supposed to have this?”  It comes to mind first, before my decision to get it.  Then, “Can I afford it?” The cost of something is a primary concern unless it is something I really want and then it is of no concern.  Buying decisions are not rational, nor objective; they are emotional

Price and a sense of what the thing is worth factor heavily into any decision to buy.  If I get the feeling that I am being used somehow, I don’t participate in that market unless it is absolutely necessary.  Buying a car and selling a house are two major examples.

With the car, the dealership, no matter what they say,  is poised to take advantage of the buyer.   So I have purchased cars from individuals and felt pretty good about it; from dealerships and felt terrible about it, as if I’d been unfairly used by them for their profit.  I tend to buy and keep a car for as long as possible to avoid the market.

The same with selling a house; usurious fees for real estate agents tend to discoruage me from moving from one residence to another.  I sold our first house in 1973 and paid a Realtor, second and third in 1985 and 1989 and the company paid for these sales; we are living in the fourth and the thought of paying 7% of the selling price will keep me in place until it is absolutely necessary to move.

On the other hand,  there are things that I wanted so badly that I didn't think about the cost/ price of it and probably paid a large premium for them.  Some examples are: work clothes, i.e. suits, shirts, ties, and shoes when I joined the management of the company, Dale Carnegie training, my sailboats, ski trips, travels around France and Europe while there, and our current house.

Much of my attitude about money was shaped when I sat down at age 18 and independently figured out how much we would need to go back to college and get my degree.  I had to pinch pennies and put whatever I could into savings to get that amount, and get it I did.

It was just enough because we were flat broke upon graduation. I had in my pocket enough to get by a week or two in Newport News until my first paycheck came through; and the discipline didn't stop after that.  It was a financial struggle the whole time until we moved to Houston.  It was then that the money situation eased up a bit and we were flush.  My salary was nearly doubled to give you an idea of the situation in Newport News.

There were psychological influences on me after that due to many years of scrimping and saving and they continue to confine my thinking, somewhat.  We continue to live carefully but not frugally. We enjoyed life in a limited way in Houston and amassed a decent amount of savings, which when added to the appreciation we realized on our houses gave us a nice “nut” to invest.

It was invested in a no-load mutual fund that met criteria that I set.  It had to have a certain capitalization, a good track record over-all, and it had to have made it through the mid-eighties recession without a loss.  I found such a fund and it was a very successful investment.  The appreciated value of the original investment allowed us to build this house and make the necessary investment in a franchise.

When we came back from France there was also enough money that we didn't have to be concerned about it.  Then I got laid off but still we weren't concerned about money because the company made a generous separation settlement.  We were able to get settled in Louisville without difficulty and have everything we need.

I realize that cost and price are not related in most instances.  That price is set by some subjective reasoning based on market value and that a seller will do all in his power to get his price.  He will lie, cheat, and misrepresent as much as possible to get the sale.  It is this suspicion that keeps me alert.  I hear war stories from salespeople, I read about scams; I know that market sets the price but a good salesman can prey upon a relationship to keep a buyer in place. 

All of this makes me more than suspicious; it makes me cynical of others’ motives but in most instances I am sensitive and want people to like me, not cold, calculating, ruthless, and insensitive.  Therefore I don't push for the lower price, the better deal to get the balance on my side.

On this issue I am less than routinely successful but there were many instances while I was working at the shipyard, corporate headquarters, France, and especially in my own business operations that I was able to forge a good, if not exemplary deal and see it through but my basic temperament is more kindly and submissive than that.

Aware of this “nice guy” weakness, I approach things in a different way.  I resolve ahead of time what I want and need to make a deal, qualify a supplier and then pretty much give in to the deal offered.  Often it seems better than what I was thinking about in the first place; more verification that I don’t have a lot of imagination in the marketplace.

As I now think about it, there isn't much that is critical of the way I am handling our finances except for a lack of imagination.  I can reflect upon all the different criteria that have influenced my choices along the way, even today.  Independent of need and desire is the avoidance being “taken.”  I approach any situation involving the exchange of money, whether I’m buying or selling, with trepidation.

Is There Another Way?

Wipe the slate clean.  This is the admonition I am giving to me now that I’ve planned the year ahead according to the way I have done it for many years.  Now is not the time to go into the history of the planning process so I am not going to revisit any of that as I go forward.
 

When I say wipe the slate clean, I mean throw out all of the preconceived notions about what is and isn’t, or what I would like it to be and do a recalculation based on some desires that are yet to be discovered or defined.  What could they be?  By definition, I don’t know.

This is where I found myself many years ago when I took control of my activities to some extent.  Now I want to revisit that frame of mind and see if it results in anything new or different.  It is going to be tres difficile because I am surrounded by the results of where we’ve been and how we got to where we are.  This house and our belongings all reflect the choices made over the past many years.

In fact, however, we are always at a place where we can do differently with or without the aid of a disaster that takes away what we have amassed.  A disaster can be simulated by simply walking away from what we have and what we are doing.  This was the advice I heard given by a psychologist on a radio talk show to a person contemplating suicide; she said to give everything away.  Thinking about that, it would certainly simulate suicide.

I have often looked at what I have and wanted to discard what I thought was not useful anymore.  It is difficult to throw something away.  Things I haven’t used for years appear to be easy targets until I am in the act of discarding them and then all of a sudden they become difficult to toss.

This is the same with my life as I am living it now.  I want to get out of the traces but thinking about actually doing it gives me pause.  So, I’ll fool myself by saying it is an exercise in imagination; a stroll down a different path for life and living.  Would it be so difficult to stop doing what I am and do something different?

Reflecting on the past several years I would say that I've done this and continue to do so even though I have this regimented approach to life.  There are some things I am doing now that I wasn't doing 5 to 10 years ago such as acting and playing competitive pool, so it isn't as if I am in some sort of rut when it comes to endeavors. 

There are other things that I have been doing continuously for years and years such as writing, golf, and horseback riding with only slight improvement.  Other things have clicked, such as cooking and entertaining, and have shown marked improvement.  Some endeavors have been abandoned over time such as management, sailing, and Dale Carnegie training.  One can objectively say, therefore, that some evolution of activities has taken place.

If I am going to change the direction and focus of my life, I will have to start back at the beginning of the planning process and go from there. What I have now is integrated for Planning Categories, Life Categories, and Traits and Features. Endeavors are consistent with all of these and…”De lawd smiled down on de whole persession.”

As I sit here and muse about it, I can readily see that just like going through my clothes closet I am not going to throw away what I have and start over again.  Even doing so would retrace what I've done so far and would lead me back to the same place where I am right now.

Just for the sake of argument, let’s say we lock up the house, cars in the garage and leave it along with all of our possessions for an indeterminate period of time, taking only our ATM card and whatever cash we have in the account. 

We could keep up with our mortgage and other payments using library PC’s wherever we are, move about using public transportation such as planes, trains, buses, and rental cars, buy whatever clothes we need as we need them and discard whatever we aren't wearing or using.  By necessity we would have only what could be carried along in a small case.

Where would we go, what would we do, and why?  This leads me back to where we are now.  We are limited now by our lack of imagination and would again be so limited if we were to abandon all and go away. 

Would we wind up in a homeless shelter or sitting for hours on a park bench trying to think of the next thing to do or place to go?  How is that so different from what we do now?  Then as now we would be only limited by our imagination.   No, starting out without a destination is not possible or is it?

Starting out without a destination requires that one be open to any and all possibilities that come up during the course of events.  It would require that one meet all circumstances with an attitude of acceptance of people and events, making the most of the opportunities that present themselves.

The allure of it is the uncertainty; waking up in the morning with only the knowledge that something will happen and looking forward to participating in it whatever it may be.  This can happen under this current structure if only I go out there and intercourse with others.  I have a daily that says, “Getting out more,  I make myself available,” but I don’t.  After all of this, here it is; this is it.  Now do it!

The Last Word of the Year

One must keep in mind that these essays are written for the writer and aren’t necessarily meant to be instructive for others.  It’s been almost 10 years since the first of the “morning pages” was written and 5 years since this blog was opened.

It was stated in the beginning what the ground rules were for this blog; 1000 words or less, sometimes random thoughts, always thoughts that were in the fore of the writer’s thinking at the moment.  Many of the entries are developmental in that they are an expression of what is on the mind of the writer at the time he is writing and not the finished product of analysis.

Unlike theses and dissertations, these entries are the informal thoughts of a traveler along the path in search of reasonable answers to the meaning of life and living.  The path is long and meandering, sometimes to the point of making the reader doubt the veracity of the writer.  In this the reader is not alone, sometimes the writer, reading the essays, doubts what was written.  The essays nonetheless are an honest expression of what was on the writer’s mind at the time.

The question of atheism comes up in the mind of the writer.  It can be concluded that the concept of God is a handy cop-out to real thinking about what is and has been going on for millions of years, as near an eternity as there is.  As a matter of fact, if you ask 10 people to tell you what is God you will get ten different answers.  They may all have similarity but there is no definitive statement as to what is God.

As for creation or evolution; life on the planet today is the result of incremental intelligent choices made by organized life as it reproduces.  Just as one can look back on the results of any organization, be it a company or a government, and plot the evolution of thinking that took it to where it is today, so too can one do this for organized life.

There is only the choice made in each reproduction; in the analogous organization, the choice made in each decision.  There is no way of knowing what will happen next, only what has already happened.

Just as all of life is only one generation from extinction, so too it is changing incrementally based on reproductive choices.  That is evolution; it is guided only by the intelligent choice made at the time of reproduction.

Since it is my contention that there is a spiritual side to beings, it follows that just as that side manages the day to day activities of the being it also manages the reproductive choices that are made.  And furthermore, the beings in question are all of organized life from the simplest to the most complex and not just we humans.

All of life exists on the surface of the Earth in a layer from the highest to the lowest level of 11 miles thick on a sphere that has a radius of 4000 miles or 0.00275; on a sphere with a diameter of a foot, that would be 0.0169 inches about 1/64 of an inch; not very much.

It can also be noted that life has not been definitively found elsewhere in the universe but is unique to this planet.  Is it an accidental phenomenon or the result of some spiritual, in the sense of not physical, influence that occurred on the one planet that could support organized life as we know it?

Once begun, the intelligent choices made by reproducing organisms have brought us to where we are today.  Looking back on the record, the argument for evolution is made but looking ahead one can see the argument for incremental intelligent choice.

Those same choices, made by a multitude of predecessors and contemporaries, make it possible for me to sit here and record these thoughts and, perhaps, for a reader to be stimulated to think for himself.