Monday, October 12, 2009

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Monday October 12, 2009

There was an unusual scenario that played itself out in my mind’s eye this morning. I sat to meditate with the express intention of putting into practice one of Jim Scorches’ techniques, one that he told me to try; he didn’t tell me the content, but the technique.


I have been struggling with his instruction/ request, “What would you like it to be like in six months?” That’s April 2010. My response has been less than specific because I have in place a full set of goals and objectives for this year and will do likewise for next year when the time is right; i.e. from the solstice to the New Year. I suppose I’m having trouble with his request because if I knew what I wanted I wouldn’t need his help to find and articulate it.


And yet this isn’t fair, it’s just that we are on different pages. I am struggling to eliminate that which is hindering me from opening the doors of my imagination and he is sitting there thinking all I have to do is say what it is I want to do. I don’t have a frame of reference for it. One of my previous blogs went into all of this. My visions contain two possibilities, one is acting in productions, and the other is participating in a business venture with others. The similarity of the two is not lost on me. The difference is the composition of the players. In the acting/productions alternative, the actors are pursuing a common goal, to be part of a successful production as well as their personal success. In the other, my experiences lead me to believe that the others are more interested in sacrificing the desired end result in favor of satisfying their greed.


I suppose being able to recognize the tendency of people to enrich themselves at the expense of the common good is s.t. that causes me a problem in looking at others; being able to deal constructively with them in an unknown environment. OTOH knowing that people are like this and building it into the business model along with protections against advantages being taken would allow one to bring others in to the organization.


The other side of the coin is that one has to be ready to operate without any one person/member because the grass is always greener and they will quit on a moment’s notice to get some sort of perceived improvement in their lot. On the third side/ the edge of the coin/ when there is a person like Albert Pujoles one has to get out his checkbook and satisfy whatever; this in the case of a small business could be a “piece of the action.” These are a lot of words to say that the greed thing is real, it is recognized, and if one wants to bring others into the organization he has to deal with it and be able to reconcile the consequences.


Then there’s a desire for more than money, for power over the dominant leader. This, like money, is s.t. with which many otherwise nice people get enthralled. They want to call the shots, especially if you tell them all the secrets of the operation. An actor wants to direct, a player wants to manage, and a worker wants to be boss. Only in a play is the actor required to remain through the end of the run. I am somewhat discouraged about being involved in a business.


This is why I am struggling so mightily with Jim’s question. I am discouraged, fearful, isolated, insulated, inhibited, and unable to deal effectively with the possibility of opening up to others with my requests for either a role or a job. This is at least one thing that is preventing me from seeing the opportunities that may be ready to be exploited. If there are lots of green objects lying about and one is wearing green filter glasses, he won’t see them.


Part of the answer to Jim’s question is a desire to take off the filters that are preventing me from seeing the opportunities that are lying about; and I’m convinced that there are a multitude of them. The experience I had this morning was a step in that direction; towards taking off the blinders, towards answering his question.


So this morning may have been another step in this direction. I imagined me going into the Rio Movie Theater. I like to recall this theater because I remember the deep blue and purple color scheme, art deco doors with such handles and round viewports, the illuminated flat statuary on the walls, the glass case concession stand in the lobby and a host of other details.


As I passed through the doors into the seating area, hundreds of personae burst out of me and took their seats. Each was behaving as he would, some were rowdy and boisterous, others were reserved and quiet, and all were animated because this was, indeed, something new. The brain-body, empty of personae, walked to a seat on the aisle, not far from the front.


Then, as would a violin emerge from a plain case, Master made his appearance from the brain-body. The audience was hushed as he made his way to center stage. Never before had his presence been seen; he often makes it felt in his inimitable way, as influence rather than sight or words. His normal way is to press but not react, so that if the results aren’t what he wants he simply waits for the next opportunity; he has eternity.


He stood there, resembling the crystal figurine but now not a figurine but the animated Master himself. He is mute, he didn’t speak, but his gestures left no doubt in the crowd of personae; there has to be an end to doubt, fear, and the distractions that deter his development. The sitting by idly while lifetime passes is no longer an option; participating in a less than a whole hearted manner cannot be tolerated; emotional responses need to be registered and discounted for what they are, distractions from getting the desired results.


One can only speculate on what desired development means for Master, one can be reassured that some personae will/ are permanent to the being and as he develops in ways that only he can know, so will they develop and move on with him to a new lifetime. His message was clear, stop marking time; get on with it, whatever it is. Do something, even if it’s imperfect.

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