Yesterday I wrote a rather long item about my current situation here at home. It was therapeutic for me and I'll read it again sometime. There is, however, something else on my mind, which may have been triggered by that writing session.
It seems that we have needs that must be met more or less in parallel, or that must be met at different moments/times of day. An obvious one is nourishment of the physical body, a second, and equally obvious, is for sleep, the third is the need to participate in the world around us, and the fourth is the need for sexual expression.
We get hungry, we find and eat food, digest it, utilize it to repair/ replace used cells, and eliminate the waste. This is a contant process, it goes on all the time and we are not consciously aware of it-- generally. We get involved on a conscious level while looking for food and drink, become aware of the processes through sounds, smells, and the sensations around them, respond to the need to excrete waste be it solid, liquid or gas. Otherwise we are not involved. Although the involvement described above is continual and requires attention, it is not like healing which continues without any attention other than that called for by pain. A great deal of our lifetime is spent attending to nourishment of the body.
Another need, and one over which we have little control, is sleep. Here I am referring to becoming unconscious for an extended period of time, hours. It seems that there is this requirement to go to sleep every day, It is so strong that it occurs whether we want it or not; such as when one falls asleep while reading or watching TV or even while driving a car.
The body continues to function during sleep and much research has been done about it but it remains something of a mystery. Suffice it so say that it is a period of the day when physical and psychic damage is repaired. One can also say that it is an extreme state, i.e. the part of our being that makes decisions is turned off and the personae of the "instinctive source" take over.
So sleeping and eating are two basic process required for life. There are other needs that are in play all the time at least while we are conscious but these two are fundamental and there are two others that are also fundamental.
A third primal need is participation. "No man is an island." We cannot be satisfied for very long if we are not in some way attached to one or more others. From the very beginning of a lifetime, we are part of a group. It starts with mother and family, then in teen-age years it ranges out to schools, church, groups such as scouts, teams, or gangs; then as we grow older there are work groups. Some even make a career out of it in politics or government in one form or another.
Our need to participate shows itself in conversation. This is the basis of participation and it can be in talking or corresponding in writing or on-line. The need to participate, or be a part of s.t. beyond our individual self is as basic as any of the other needs discussed thus far.
The fourth of the primary needs is sexual expression, i.e. satisfying the urge to procreate. The urge expresses itself in many ways. It begins with, or is made apparent by, a supply of semen in a man and ovulation in a woman. The need for the man is for relief; for the woman it's fulfillment.
A man has a sac of semen and seeks out a place to make a deposit; a woman has an egg that is ready for fertilization. From these two basics unfolds some bizarre behavior. This behavior is the result of other aspects of the being getting involved, especially personae of the "emotional source."
A being is made aware of this need at the onset of puberty when semen begins to be produced by the male and ovulation occurs in the female. It continues until both of these end later in life but can be prolonged either medically or through imagination stirred by stimuli.
The ability to cope with this need is developed over time. There are societal conventions which are violated in secret all the time. When violations become publicized there are repercussions. It's interesting that almost everyone violates these conventions at one or more times but still expresses condemnation when observed in others.
Dealing with situations that arise from this need fills many volumes of literature in all forms: poems, plays, novels, fables, myth, and even "spiritually" inspired works. As anyone else, I could tell stories of my own exploits in this arena but will spare the reader and me. Now in my 79th year, the need has subsided and can be more objectively described. There is, however, a long span of lifetime during which a man or woman must deal with this need.
Beyond our four basic needs there are permutations of them. Recognizing them and dealing objectively with them is the secret of success shared by many. Going to extremes with or in any of them can be problematical.
There are situations where society, i.e. the larger community, makes rules and or laws to regulate the effect on others of one satisfying his own needs. Violating these rules has consequences, some more severe than others. Satisfying one's own needs to the detriment of others becomes criminal in some cases. Punishment can range from a reprimand to prison and even death.
Obeying and disobeying rules can become an obsession and one extreme is a s bad as the other. (A good example is my little essay, Mind the Yellow Line.) Volumes could be, and have been, written on situations where people have behaved at one extreme or the other.
There are situations where the perpetrator is, in his own mind, simply meeting a need without regard to the effect he's having on others. It is this very situation for which the laws are written. The law is there to guide and to punish. The punishment being for the wrong and the guide as an example to others to refrain from that same behavior.
The next installment deals with what we do in addition to satisfying basic needs; the icing on the cake.
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