Confident Performance-- Getting To It

When I am performing, I am rarely satisfied with the result.  What I do, i.e. every performance whether it is riding, golf, pool, or acting, seems to be inferior in some way.  This is because I have an ideal performance in mind and rarely, if ever, achieve it.  This is not true of analytic endeavors, I am confident of my ability to analyze and reach conclusions, agreeable to others or not.  My track record in the analytic arena is very good. 

When finishing an acting effort, whether a monologue or a scene in a  play or movie, I come away thinking that it was not very good because there is no objective measure for me to use for comparison.  There is, by definition, no objective measure of performance; it is always subjective.  Each member of the audience reacts in his own way.  Yet there is an overall feeling about a performance that members of the audience get, it is portrayal of the character in that situation and they discuss it afterwards.  I think it is this discussion phase that bothers me; I care very much what they say.

It is a bit different when participating in golf, pool, or riding; I know right away if my performance was good or not.  There are objective measures for these activities: good hits, sink the ball and gain shape,  clear the jumps in sequence.

“When in a competitive or conspicuous situation, I keep my mind on my objective and stay aware of my surroundings.”  This is one of my daily affirmations and it contains the wisdom necessary for this conundrum.  As has often happened in the past, writing out the feelings and the situation brings forth a conclusion, a prescription for success.

Aha!  The missing ingredient is an objective in every situation where I feel less than comfortable, less than confident.  And this is not just in the overall situation but in each increment of the situation from curtain to applause.

There may be many “beats” to the scene; each one has to have an objective to which it is played.  This is true in all performances, whenever I am engaged in doing anything that involves doing rather than thinking.  Just to be clear, it pertains to riding, golf, pool, and acting.

The art of managing the situation is in the ability to be able to decide on the objective without taking a lot of time to figure it out because when one is living (and acting) at the speed of life, one doesn't have the luxury of sitting back and analyzing the situation as it unfolds.  

A script affords some hints, this is a good thing, but on the stage the action may deviate from the script and spontaneity is required; the scene has to stay on track.  It is the same in the other endeavors, what happens isn't always what was planned so reacting, regrouping, and resetting is required.

The performance of an action may not be perfect and this must be forgiven but having an objective in mind before performing it is paramount.  Constantly minding the objective, reforming it,  and executing the act as consciously as possible will eventually bring the level of performance to higher levels, even stardom.

The beauty of this conclusion is astounding to me: the basic ingredient for my confidence is to have an objective for every action to be taken.