The Womb

In a book or movie a seemingly insignificant word or phrase can become the representation of the whole text.  In The Treasure of the Sierra Madre the bandito says, “Badges, we don’t need no stinkin’ badges.” The movie is more than an hour in length and almost anyone familiar with it remembers this line.  In Gone with the Wind Rhett Butler says, “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn” and everyone remembers it.  Or hear a bell tinkle at Christmas and someone will say, “An angel just got his wings” from It’s a Wonderful Life.

My dailies are comprised of thirty-eight assertions varying in length from a few words to more than twenty.  There is one, down near the end that is innocuous but probably the most significant in a philosophical sense.   There are others that are more didactic, more prescriptive, more objective, more cautionary, more commanding, more prophetic but none more philosophical, "Being the womb of Essence, I am humble."  

There’s a reason for this and it’s because none of the others recognize the dichotomy that exists between Master and Brain-body.  Considering that there is an entity that exists in the body but is not of the body is difficult and this is what this particular daily brings to mind when it is said.

There is one time when this bipartition can be experienced, albeit briefly, and that is just before the Brain-body goes to sleep, i.e. first state.  At this point, if one is careful and aware, you can get a glimpse of that “other” part, Master.  He is mute and in his own way moves the being toward permanence.  The only time he can be experienced is at this juncture of crossing into first state, or what we commonly refer to as sleep.  Aside: Sleep has been explored in a previous entry.

 It is important for me to recognize that all of my thoughts are products of the brain, all of my sensations and reactions to them are primarily of the body.  All of my memories, imagining, reasoning, and decision making are of the brain.  The only time I can even approach experiencing the other component of my being is when all is completely still; this occurs most frequently when I am about to slip into first state.  And it is difficult to differentiate between imagined and “real” experience in this regard.

At no time does/has Master said anything yet he makes his presence felt all throughout the day/ lifetime comprised of all the days that the brain-body is alive.   He has a purpose, an agenda, but “I” am not privy to it; I know when I am acting in a way that does not agree with it because things don’t go well.

There have been times that I felt punished for behaving this way or that and the behaviors causing the problem were not necessarily what would normally be considered “bad” behaviors.  I know when I am acting in accordance with his agenda because all goes swimmingly; and this is not always what would be considered “good” behavior.

From my limited vantage point I would conclude that Master is developing and this development is facilitated by experiences of the brain-body at his disposal.   Yet there are other forces felt by the brain-body, urges, appetites, emotional responses to experiences especially those involving others, issues about the safety and security of the brain-body, issues about procreation, issues of maintenance, and issues of getting along in society.

All of these extraneous needs have to be addressed by the brain-body but fundamentally Master has needs to be met in order for him to reach permanency.  Yet, it would seem that there is a realization that if for some reason his needs aren’t met it’s okay because he has the choice of continuing his quest in a subsequent existence.

It may be vanity but my thinking is that the Master in me is enjoying development along whatever lines he desires and has been for some years now.  There is a certain physical equilibrium and mental peace that is enjoyed day in and day out which can only come from conforming to his desires.  There have been other periods in this lifetime where things were out of kilter with what were probably his desires and there were physical and psychic problems associated with those periods of time which went away when the behaviors changed.

It is difficult to see a reflection of this visage without identifying with it; even more difficult to see a reflection and realize that this is one aspect of my being, and an important one but not the only one.  Our eyes are positioned such that we cannot see ourselves is a clue to the situation that we are in.  It wasn’t until the camera that we were able to see a true image and it won’t be until holographic technology is perfected that we will see a true three dimensional image of ourselves.

If all of this is my imagination, then I’ll die and that will be the end of it but at the very least I will have had an interesting time of it on the way as I stay open to other possibilities.  In the meantime I will continue think about it and continue to seek Master, perhaps meet him.  Not out of the question because I don’t know.

There are many religions in the world and some espouse similar thoughts to these; my inherent distrust of organized religion, and those who think they understand it and consequently preach it, precludes me from glomming on to any of them.  Yet there are some interesting albeit obscure references to that of which I am writing.  One has to be sensitive to these ideas and then see how they creep out of the woodwork when allowed to do so.

But most important, one must think about it and continue to do so without becoming dogmatic.  Where am I?  I am here.  I want to go there.  Where is there?