The Secret

Everybody wants to know the secret; it is the answer to our prayers, the way to get the skill, riches, awards, medals, and stardom that we crave; The Secret is also the title of a DVD that is devoted to getting what you want.  I watched it and came away with mixed feelings.

The prescription is not new to me, it is s.t. to which I was exposed in my youth when my dad gave me the seven little red books and it has been repeated often in my experience with reading and listening to various motivational people.  Yet listening to it again was a sort of reaffirmation of the phenomenon.

A disturbing aspect of watching the movie is coming away with the feeling that there is something lacking in me and I want to explore that here.  Nothing could be farther from reality and yet this is a common reaction that I have whenever I hear or listen to someone who has made it big.  What’s wrong with me that I’m not equally successful?  It seems that I have a modicum of success when others have an abundance of it.   This is a defect in my thinking. 

The reminder in the movie to “count your blessings” is an aspect of the whole philosophy of which I could do a lot more.  I tend to focus on the half empty instead of the half full; tend to look as what has to be done instead of what has been accomplished, tend to get discouraged when I realize that I’m not there yet; tend to jump off the train before it reaches its destination.  I could recount actions that I’ve taken in my lifetime that would be examples of each of the above and there are more than one of each.

All of these are pitfalls to the success mentality.  So I’m making a resolution that from this time now and on I will practice the opposite of all of the above.  I’ll be looking for the good, the success, the accomplishment, the small improvement in performance that is made—and there is always a positive aspect to be observed.

Then there is the lack of associations that I continue to decry; another change that has to be made in my thinking.  When I reflect on my associations I can see that I have sufficient to get the help, advice, assistance, and company to do whatever.  For every one of my endeavors for which an association is appropriate, there are some.   The focus of my thinking has to be on the appreciation of those associations and encourage them.

Then there’s the jealousy factor whenever I am involved in s.t.  I am putting it down here because it has been a factor in the past.  I found myself being sensitive to others taking credit for my efforts; horning in on my territory, using association with me to feather their nest at, what I saw as, my expense.

This comes from the desire for recognition and it is totally bogus.  If I am doing s.t for recognition, it is being done for the wrong reason.  I have recognized this and now tend to do things to make a good “recital” and not bragging rights.  And the good recital is for my benefit and not that of others except that they not feel uncomfortable watching or listening.

The lesson of recognition came home during the past few months.  I was recognized by the French government with the Order of Merit and by my Rotary Club as Rotarian of the Year.  Neither of these was the result of a conscious effort on my part except to work hard at the jobs I had.

One could delve into past situations and performance to hammer home the ideas set out above but that would be counterproductive at the very best.  I am here, I want to be there.  Recognizing the changes in my thinking and making them will certainly help me get there.

Repeating them here for my own benefit:

1) Know specifically what I want including a willingness to work for it

2) Concentrate on the good things that I already have

3) See the positive aspect of any and all that I do

4) Appreciate and be sensitive to the associations that I have

5) Work for the greater good, not for recognition

There was another aspect that was brought out by the movie; it is emotional involvement in the pursuit of aim.  It is reported here but only to recognize it as part of the picture.  The emotional involvement is the enjoyment of the prospect of working on aim with the added thought that when objective aim is consistent with the development aim of Master there is a fundamental resonance that enables one to experience joy.

Who Will Do for Me

A thought haunts me and I’m not sure how it’s going to pan out when it gets into writing because a conclusion hasn’t been reached about it, just a thought.  So the writing will be a way of thinking about it and, who knows, some conclusion may be reached after a while at this keyboard.

I’ve written about waiting and this is a related thought, or topic; well it has to be a thought because it doesn’t have a name yet so it can’t quite be a topic, it relates to having nil to do.  When all that has been listed is done what’s next?  But it is an even broader sense of this about which I want to write.

Suppose one was to have enough resources at his disposal to hire someone to do all the mundane work that he normally does, all of the little things that take up his time and thought; what would he do with the time that was now available? 

Starting with getting up in the morning one would have to take care of grooming and dressing himself but where would it go from there?  It could be that the meals were prepared by s.o. else and ready to eat; the log would have to be written personally, as would reading the current book, the bit of French reading, and chiro stretches but once those few chores were out of the way?

If one were to arise at a reasonably early hour, say seven o’clock, the minimal chores would be complete within forty-five minutes or so.  That would mean that from eight o’clock until eleven p.m. there would be no prescribed chores to be done. 

There would be no yard work, landscaping, or plant watering, contracted out; no meals, cooked by others; no bills or correspondence, administered by others except for immediate matters that required response; no leather cleaning, shoe shining, small repairs, car maintenance, shopping, laundry, dry cleaning, driving, dishes, or housework, done by others; don’t have to make the bed, hang up the towels, or clean up the dishes.

The big question is what would personally be done?  The answer lies in the endeavors.  Right now they are a list of twenty items and we need to look at them to see the survivors and those to be hired out.  The actions I take to pursue my endeavors are: audition, utilize (assets), associate, serve (community), enjoy (cooking), use (digital technology), manage (personal finances), exercise, study (French), play (golf), think (life and living), develop (maintain brain-body), compete (pool), ride (horses), sketch, socialize, act, travel, write, and work (maintain the house and yard.)

Of these I could hire out utilize digital technology, manage personal finances, and work to maintain the house.  All the others are things that I want to do for personal achievement and to enjoy my time during the day.  The digital technology aspect could be hired out so I would specify what I wanted installed and utilized and have someone else make sure that it was done and that I am trained.

How much of my time and psychic energy would be freed by such an arrangement?  Since each of these is that to which physical and psychic energy is being applied, we can think of it as a bubble of present activity.  This bubble expands and contracts with desired results.  When something has to be done, the bubble inflates; when it is completed it deflates, or even pops.  It is when it hangs around not finished that it begins to bother me.

In almost every instance of my life this is the scenario; a goal or activity is selected and then work goes on to accomplish same.  As in the case of the telephone service modification, it is hanging around a long time unfinished due to unforeseen circumstances.  Unfinished, misbegotten, procrastinated, or otherwise incomplete activities cause me considerable angst.

Sometimes less important endeavors, and by this I mean less directly related to the achievement of my major aim(s), are used as a distraction from spending time and energy on the majors.  The majors being acting and writing, and then there are others that get neglected out of laziness or even reluctance; these are: associating, utilizing assets (improving net worth), French, and social.

In fact, there wouldn’t be a lot of time made available if I was to hire out those that could be done by others.  By the time I managed someone to do this it would be easier and more time efficient for me to do it myself.  The only requirements for me are (1) the ability to see what needs doing, (2) the discipline necessary to do it, and (3)stop when no further progress can be made for additional effort.

The plotting and scheming that I do each week keep me going but it could be that it allows me to think that I’m making progress when actually there is much more to be made if I applied myself to it more diligently.  The question from Alan Aiken in his book How to Get Control of Your Time and Your Life has to be asked over and over again: “What is the best use I can make of my time, right now?”

The answer has to be objective rather than expedient.  This is the second pitfall into which I fall because I will often pick s.t. that is fun, pleasant, easy, or distracting instead of s.t. that moves me towards achievement of aim.  Along with this is the discounting of laziness and reluctance.  All too often s.t. doesn’t happen because of one or the other of these and then I become aware of the lost opportunity later and get filled with regret and often become critical of me.

One gage of achievement is how much time one spends waiting.  The optimum situation is to have enough of a grasp of what needs doing to achieve aim that one can fill every waking moment with doing it.  

To sum up this post, if you need a helping hand, look at the end of your arm.

The Womb

In a book or movie a seemingly insignificant word or phrase can become the representation of the whole text.  In The Treasure of the Sierra Madre the bandito says, “Badges, we don’t need no stinkin’ badges.” The movie is more than an hour in length and almost anyone familiar with it remembers this line.  In Gone with the Wind Rhett Butler says, “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn” and everyone remembers it.  Or hear a bell tinkle at Christmas and someone will say, “An angel just got his wings” from It’s a Wonderful Life.

My dailies are comprised of thirty-eight assertions varying in length from a few words to more than twenty.  There is one, down near the end that is innocuous but probably the most significant in a philosophical sense.   There are others that are more didactic, more prescriptive, more objective, more cautionary, more commanding, more prophetic but none more philosophical, "Being the womb of Essence, I am humble."  

There’s a reason for this and it’s because none of the others recognize the dichotomy that exists between Master and Brain-body.  Considering that there is an entity that exists in the body but is not of the body is difficult and this is what this particular daily brings to mind when it is said.

There is one time when this bipartition can be experienced, albeit briefly, and that is just before the Brain-body goes to sleep, i.e. first state.  At this point, if one is careful and aware, you can get a glimpse of that “other” part, Master.  He is mute and in his own way moves the being toward permanence.  The only time he can be experienced is at this juncture of crossing into first state, or what we commonly refer to as sleep.  Aside: Sleep has been explored in a previous entry.

 It is important for me to recognize that all of my thoughts are products of the brain, all of my sensations and reactions to them are primarily of the body.  All of my memories, imagining, reasoning, and decision making are of the brain.  The only time I can even approach experiencing the other component of my being is when all is completely still; this occurs most frequently when I am about to slip into first state.  And it is difficult to differentiate between imagined and “real” experience in this regard.

At no time does/has Master said anything yet he makes his presence felt all throughout the day/ lifetime comprised of all the days that the brain-body is alive.   He has a purpose, an agenda, but “I” am not privy to it; I know when I am acting in a way that does not agree with it because things don’t go well.

There have been times that I felt punished for behaving this way or that and the behaviors causing the problem were not necessarily what would normally be considered “bad” behaviors.  I know when I am acting in accordance with his agenda because all goes swimmingly; and this is not always what would be considered “good” behavior.

From my limited vantage point I would conclude that Master is developing and this development is facilitated by experiences of the brain-body at his disposal.   Yet there are other forces felt by the brain-body, urges, appetites, emotional responses to experiences especially those involving others, issues about the safety and security of the brain-body, issues about procreation, issues of maintenance, and issues of getting along in society.

All of these extraneous needs have to be addressed by the brain-body but fundamentally Master has needs to be met in order for him to reach permanency.  Yet, it would seem that there is a realization that if for some reason his needs aren’t met it’s okay because he has the choice of continuing his quest in a subsequent existence.

It may be vanity but my thinking is that the Master in me is enjoying development along whatever lines he desires and has been for some years now.  There is a certain physical equilibrium and mental peace that is enjoyed day in and day out which can only come from conforming to his desires.  There have been other periods in this lifetime where things were out of kilter with what were probably his desires and there were physical and psychic problems associated with those periods of time which went away when the behaviors changed.

It is difficult to see a reflection of this visage without identifying with it; even more difficult to see a reflection and realize that this is one aspect of my being, and an important one but not the only one.  Our eyes are positioned such that we cannot see ourselves is a clue to the situation that we are in.  It wasn’t until the camera that we were able to see a true image and it won’t be until holographic technology is perfected that we will see a true three dimensional image of ourselves.

If all of this is my imagination, then I’ll die and that will be the end of it but at the very least I will have had an interesting time of it on the way as I stay open to other possibilities.  In the meantime I will continue think about it and continue to seek Master, perhaps meet him.  Not out of the question because I don’t know.

There are many religions in the world and some espouse similar thoughts to these; my inherent distrust of organized religion, and those who think they understand it and consequently preach it, precludes me from glomming on to any of them.  Yet there are some interesting albeit obscure references to that of which I am writing.  One has to be sensitive to these ideas and then see how they creep out of the woodwork when allowed to do so.

But most important, one must think about it and continue to do so without becoming dogmatic.  Where am I?  I am here.  I want to go there.  Where is there?